Equipyourself for the legal battle: Many communities offer free divorce workshops, support groups or clinics through the courthouse.I encourage you to spend a day in the courtroom to which you were assigned.
They could come barreling out at the wrong place and time, causing all kinds of unexpected consequences.Don’t assume all attorneys are created equal.
In fact, when a narcissist feels hurt or cornered he might be more likely to turn on the charm, whether toward you or the courts.If you find that you and your spouse need to continue to communicate directly, consider using a service like To you, the case may be clear-cut. A spouse’s self-centeredness becomes, somehow, attractive, pulling you back into his orbit.
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All rights reserved.Dealing with someone who suffers from Narcissistic Personality Disorder in the family court system is a daunting task that is made even more difficult if you are in pro se, or self-represented.This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. A logged account of how much time you spend with the kids, or even documentation of a simple phone call, could save you in court.We see it all the time. But if you have the right By joining your soon-to-be ex in this turmoil, you’re stooping to his level and giving him ammunition in his fight against you.
And we have the experience to back it up.If you’re facing a high-conflict divorce, learn more about how we can help your case. And believe us, he’ll take all the ammunition he can get, even if some of it is made up. Keep conversation centered on the kids only, not their custody, nor anything else related to the case.Don’t forget: Narcissists can be alluring, and that doesn’t necessarily stop just because you’re divorcing. Whatever you do, don’t bury your emotions or ignore them. But you can’t expect the courts to see it your way. ©2020 Verizon Media. With the insight in this book, you will fully understand how to destroy a narcissist in court. A Custody Mediation Attorney Can Help At Babbitt & Dahlberg, we’ll fight for you, but we’ll do it smartly and deliberately. You will remain one step ahead. (The world revolves around them, after all, right? Dealing with someone who suffers from Narcissistic Personality Disorder in the family court system is a daunting task that is made even more difficult if you are in pro se, or self-represented.
This advice is organically developed after spending the past four years acting as my own attorney in a hellish custody battle with someone who is an extremely high-conflict personality. Maybe your spouse will never accept blame, is endlessly combative, or consistently manipulates situations involving you and your child.Whatever strategies your narcissistic ex might employ, you can successfully gain custody of your child by proactively following some simple steps. While each court room is unique, I happen to have lots of advice for those who find themselves in pro se. Divorce is difficult enough but if you find yourself in pro se against a narcissist then you will need to secure your safety belt and use your oxygen mask as needed. Your spouse is likely to concoct all manner of stories, which the courts might buy given his considerable charm. Share Tweet Pin It Stop being played!
And believe us, he’ll take all the ammunition he can get, even if some of it is made up.This one can be hard to stick to, particularly if you have kids together, when it may be unavoidable. That’s what fuels their fragile little egos. Sometimes, the only proof you have of a narcissist’s behavior is your word against his or hers, so you’ll need to have hard evidence to back up what you’re saying. I’ve always said, going back to the beginning days of my own divorce and custody battle with one of these individuals, his goal was to see me eating Top Ramen out of a dumpster on a Friday night.
Remain clear-minded and open to all outcomes. No one said that this was going to be easy -- they were lying if they did! Before you know it, your narcissistic ex has convinced you you’re crazy, your needs are outlandish, or that your perspective is simply wrong.This often happens when blinded by emotions.
But if you’re prepared for those outcomes, you’ll be better able to respond to them.It’s tempting to think of this as deceptive or sneaky, but by documenting your interactions — and your ex’s interactions with the kids — you’re merely arming yourself with a record of the truth. A narcissist is singularly focused on winning at all costs. 1. If you’re divorcing a narcissist, chances are he or she won’t go quietly into the night.Narcissists are self-centered, full of themselves, and boastful.
Navigating a custody battle with a narcissistic spouse is at the top of the list for stressful splits. Knowledge is power and being educated and prepared has been life changing for me personally. Remain as calm as you can. Document everything. You’re likely a bundle of nerves and messy emotions that seem confusing and contradictory, even. The only way to win against a narcissist is to take away the control he or she has over you. No one has it all together. )Add all that up, and your divorce suddenly becomes high-conflict, not to mention expensive and traumatic. You will be in control and destroy a narcissist in court. Keep yourself clean by steering clear of mudslinging. Keep your playbook handy at all times!Part of HuffPost News. Here are 7 steps to take to survive a divorce with a narcissist. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, A weekly guide to improving all of the relationships in your lifeA weekly guide to improving all of the relationships in your lifePart of HuffPost News. All rights reserved. Their game is all about manipulating you. Then, assess your own weaknesses, like unemployment or anger management issues, and address them by getting counseling or finding a job.
©2020 Verizon Media. Familiarize yourself with the Judge or Commissioner's style, the courtroom procedures and pay attention to the strategies used by attorneys. They’re also unable to empathize or tune in emotionally to another’s needs, which makes your soon-to-be ex more likely to seek revenge, whether through the courts or elsewhere.